Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Dear god my vagina.
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