he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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