We're facebook friends in real life
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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