All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
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