i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
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