Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
