4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
