Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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