At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team