so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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