Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
