Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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