can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
