I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Randomize
