end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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