I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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