Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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