I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
