we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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