He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize