Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
