There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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