do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
stop calling my apartment porn island.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
