how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
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And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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