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Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Found your dick twin last night
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
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