i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
