well you can't waste a boner
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
