Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
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Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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