Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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