her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
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