Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
