He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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