haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I am available for nakedness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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