Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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