Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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