Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
