Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
