apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
you traded sex for a burrito?
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
We are all done wearing pants today
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize