sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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