my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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