Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
that's an acceptable place to lick
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
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