My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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