I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
