i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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