I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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