why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
