Texts From Last Night

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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..

  (1-605): View more from South Dakota

  Both

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  (605): white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup.. (1-605): Both http://tfl.nu/cq4l
  Replies (18) Good night (1975) Bad night (607)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...

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  (516): I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero... http://tfl.nu/d5tx
  Replies (24) Good night (5568) Bad night (605)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Toronto

  She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.

  (416): View more from Ontario

  Got yourself a keeper right there.

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  (905): She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use. (416): Got yourself a keeper right there. http://tfl.nu/t8iu
  Replies (26) Good night (4904) Bad night (795)
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  (209): View more from California

  He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7

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  (209): He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7 http://tfl.nu/6n0p
  Replies (7) Good night (3622) Bad night (771)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!

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  (203): walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!! http://tfl.nu/de92
  Replies (33) Good night (768) Bad night (5433)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life

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  (626): Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life http://tfl.nu/vx9t
  Replies (16) Good night (3359) Bad night (1207)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.

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  (850): We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself. http://tfl.nu/yba7
  Replies (3) Good night (2516) Bad night (693)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end

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  (912): just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end http://tfl.nu/x0of
  Replies (12) Good night (3215) Bad night (1083)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.

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  (231): Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here. http://tfl.nu/i6i2
  Replies (10) Good night (2985) Bad night (1057)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today

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  (708): hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today http://tfl.nu/usqr
  Replies (10) Good night (1809) Bad night (1147)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?

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  (817): Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday? http://tfl.nu/r4ue
  Replies (3) Good night (1783) Bad night (597)
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  (818): View more from California

  I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?

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  (818): I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal? http://tfl.nu/2gme
  Replies (6) Good night (949) Bad night (669)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you

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  (303): I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you http://tfl.nu/s8pp
  Replies (11) Good night (741) Bad night (514)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?

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  (781): Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it? http://tfl.nu/aevy
  Replies (10) Good night (1311) Bad night (516)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it

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  (202): All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it http://tfl.nu/syvy
  Replies (2) Good night (829) Bad night (201)

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