we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Randomize
