and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
