Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
