I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
