But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Randomize
