I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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